Integrity is not a given factor in everyone's life. It's a result of self-discipline, inner trust, and a decision to be relentlessly honest in all situations in our lives. Unfortunately in today's world, strength of character is a rare commodity. As a result, we have few contemporary models of integrity. Our culture has produced few enduring heroes, few models of virtue. We have become a nation of imitators, but there are few leaders worth imitating.
The meaning of integrity has been eroded. drop the word into conversations in Hollywood, On wall street, Even on Main Street, and you'll get blank stares in return. For most Americans, the word conjures up ideas of prudishness or narrow-mindedness. In an age when the meanings of words are manipulated, foundational values such as integrity can be pulverized overnight.
Integrity is antithetical to the spirit of our age. The overarching philosophy of life that guides our culture revolves around a materialistic, consumer mentality. The craving need of the moment supersedes consideration of values that have eternal significance.
When we sell out to someone else, we also sell out ourselves. Hester H. Chomondelay underscores this truth in his short poem, "Judas"
Still as of old
Men by themselves are priced -
For thirty pieces Judas sold
Himself, not Christ.
Billy Graham said, " Integrity is the glue that holds our way of life together. We must constantly strive to keep our integrity intact.
"When wealth is lost, nothing is lost; when health is lost, something is lost; when character is lost, all is lost."
To build your life on the foundation of integrity, use the following poem ( Am I true to myself by Edgar Guest
Sunday, August 22, 2010
The final requirement of effective leadership
The final requirement of effective leadership is to earn trust. Otherwise there won't be any follower.... A leader is someone who has followers. To trust a leader, it's not necessary to agree with him. Trust is the conviction that the leader means what he says. It's a belief in something very old-fashioned called "INTEGRITY." A leader's actions and a leader professed beliefs must be congruent or at least compatible. Effective leadership - and again this is very old wisdom - is not based on being clever; It's primarily on being CONSISTENT !
This msg is specially for my dear who doubtful on her ability to lead while she possess what a great leader that requires. A strength is not possessed by many individual these days which spells out in the above post.
This msg is specially for my dear who doubtful on her ability to lead while she possess what a great leader that requires. A strength is not possessed by many individual these days which spells out in the above post.
Am I True to Myself? ( Mirror Test )
I have to live with myself, and so
I wan to be fit for myself to know,
I want to be able, as days go by,
Always to look myself straight in the eye;
I don't want to stand, with the setting sun,
And hate myself for things I have done.
I don't want to keep on a closet shelf
A lot of secrets about myself,
Into thinking that nobody else will know
The kind of man I really am;
I don't want to dress up myself in sham.
I want to go out with my head erect,
I want to deserve all men's respect;
But here in the struggle for fame and pelf
I want to be able to like myself.
I don't want to look at myself and know
That I'm bluster and bluff and empty show.
I can never hide myself from me;
I see what others may never see;
I know what others may never know,
I never can fool myself, and so,
Whatever happens, I want to be
Self Respecting and conscience free.
I wan to be fit for myself to know,
I want to be able, as days go by,
Always to look myself straight in the eye;
I don't want to stand, with the setting sun,
And hate myself for things I have done.
I don't want to keep on a closet shelf
A lot of secrets about myself,
Into thinking that nobody else will know
The kind of man I really am;
I don't want to dress up myself in sham.
I want to go out with my head erect,
I want to deserve all men's respect;
But here in the struggle for fame and pelf
I want to be able to like myself.
I don't want to look at myself and know
That I'm bluster and bluff and empty show.
I can never hide myself from me;
I see what others may never see;
I know what others may never know,
I never can fool myself, and so,
Whatever happens, I want to be
Self Respecting and conscience free.
Thursday, August 12, 2010
做人两大原则
我认为做人一定要有两个原则：
1 老鹰般的自我
2 麻雀般的团队
如想长远打算，缺一不可。
做事时，强者风范。 对人时，感性十足。 为人友善，做事专业。
而非,
做事时，拖延怠慢。 对人时，刻薄无礼。 为人骄傲，做事随便。
孤者能达之梦想，非想象中非凡，达到了才觉得空虚与寂寞已太迟了。
Direct Translation (Google) From previous Post
有时我们不希望世界知道我们真的是谁。或者，也许我们过于竭力是在别人的眼中理想的人。隐瞒自己和他人的真理 - 和生活，通过别人的眼睛我们的生活 - 可衰弱。
我遇到一个人在我的旅行，特里萨与我分享她的斗争拥抱她的限制：“我是被人喜欢驾驶。它表现为强迫自己是完美的。回想起来，我个人并没有什么概念'完美'的意思，我要。我只有我的什么人可以定义为'信仰完美的生活，我应该有什么样的工作，或谁的好日期。通过看别人的眼睛我自己是我的唯一来源的自我价值。如果不喜欢我这样的人，我会崩溃。然而，如果我有他们的批准，我将高达1风筝。如果只有一个人出一组有200个东西不好说，我会崩溃，崩溃努力。
“为了确保我保持这种完美的个人 - 在工作中或在我的个人生活 - 我会避免采取过错责任。我要么掩盖起来，或试图使它看起来好像别人的错误。它的丑陋，我知道。但我不能让任何人知道我犯了一个错误，我是不完美的。更糟的是，我从来没有一起通过信贷。我的位置在这样一种方式，我将收到的赞美情况。我一定是一个可怕的经理！我没有得到这一切在工作的尊重。很有趣，这些行动是如何我已经失去了它的原因非常多。噢，我是完美的一切权利 - 完美可怜。“虽然发言她，很明显，她在某种程度上摆脱了这种强迫自己。
我问她什么导致了她的人格转变。她怎么放下她需要在别人的眼中完美呢？她告诉我：“这不是一个有意识的决定，其实是。这是推动更多的情况。由于我要请所有的人，所有的时间，我放弃左，右球。我变得烦躁和烧毁而且越来越明显，而我的同事，我是远远不够完善。我终于承认，我不能做这一切。
“那么，一个有趣的现象发生。只要我承认我的缺点 - 这些缺陷使我绝望地试图隐藏在努力赢得尊重和爱戴，我能感觉到这巨大的重量提升。人民对我的反应不同。他们不在我所预期的不良反应的手段 - 他们其实对我更好，更真诚。人民政府要帮助和支持我。直到我发现我是不完美的世界，我开始得到尊重我有这么渴望对。我有这个想法在我的脑海里，从那里来我也许永远不会知道，我是完美的被喜爱。我就是这样一种根深蒂固的信念，我看不到它之外。现在我看到那些两种观念，是完美的，被人喜欢是相互排斥的，我已在自己的生活更加真正它。
“过去，我从来没有让自己感到任何一种消极。你知道，积极思考的力量。然而，它是这些在我的感情，造成难以克服的压力拒绝。现在不是，我承认我是如何真实的感受。如果我心情不好时，我会说的人，我是说了：“嘿，只是让你知道，我是一个可怕的情绪，如果今天我说了一些讨厌的，我想提前道歉。有一次，我拥抱我的消极的想法或信仰，我已同意寻求帮助，或请求宽恕。但在大多数情况下，以为只是暂时消失。
在您可以让全世界知道你是谁真的是，你需要知道你是谁也不知道。我们常常不喜欢看我们自己的局限性。但是，如果我们发现什么是我们的基本行为（或同事的话来说，'在你的和服看'，我们不仅对自己有一个更好的了解，然后才能真正做自己。
我遇到一个人在我的旅行，特里萨与我分享她的斗争拥抱她的限制：“我是被人喜欢驾驶。它表现为强迫自己是完美的。回想起来，我个人并没有什么概念'完美'的意思，我要。我只有我的什么人可以定义为'信仰完美的生活，我应该有什么样的工作，或谁的好日期。通过看别人的眼睛我自己是我的唯一来源的自我价值。如果不喜欢我这样的人，我会崩溃。然而，如果我有他们的批准，我将高达1风筝。如果只有一个人出一组有200个东西不好说，我会崩溃，崩溃努力。
“为了确保我保持这种完美的个人 - 在工作中或在我的个人生活 - 我会避免采取过错责任。我要么掩盖起来，或试图使它看起来好像别人的错误。它的丑陋，我知道。但我不能让任何人知道我犯了一个错误，我是不完美的。更糟的是，我从来没有一起通过信贷。我的位置在这样一种方式，我将收到的赞美情况。我一定是一个可怕的经理！我没有得到这一切在工作的尊重。很有趣，这些行动是如何我已经失去了它的原因非常多。噢，我是完美的一切权利 - 完美可怜。“虽然发言她，很明显，她在某种程度上摆脱了这种强迫自己。
我问她什么导致了她的人格转变。她怎么放下她需要在别人的眼中完美呢？她告诉我：“这不是一个有意识的决定，其实是。这是推动更多的情况。由于我要请所有的人，所有的时间，我放弃左，右球。我变得烦躁和烧毁而且越来越明显，而我的同事，我是远远不够完善。我终于承认，我不能做这一切。
“那么，一个有趣的现象发生。只要我承认我的缺点 - 这些缺陷使我绝望地试图隐藏在努力赢得尊重和爱戴，我能感觉到这巨大的重量提升。人民对我的反应不同。他们不在我所预期的不良反应的手段 - 他们其实对我更好，更真诚。人民政府要帮助和支持我。直到我发现我是不完美的世界，我开始得到尊重我有这么渴望对。我有这个想法在我的脑海里，从那里来我也许永远不会知道，我是完美的被喜爱。我就是这样一种根深蒂固的信念，我看不到它之外。现在我看到那些两种观念，是完美的，被人喜欢是相互排斥的，我已在自己的生活更加真正它。
“过去，我从来没有让自己感到任何一种消极。你知道，积极思考的力量。然而，它是这些在我的感情，造成难以克服的压力拒绝。现在不是，我承认我是如何真实的感受。如果我心情不好时，我会说的人，我是说了：“嘿，只是让你知道，我是一个可怕的情绪，如果今天我说了一些讨厌的，我想提前道歉。有一次，我拥抱我的消极的想法或信仰，我已同意寻求帮助，或请求宽恕。但在大多数情况下，以为只是暂时消失。
在您可以让全世界知道你是谁真的是，你需要知道你是谁也不知道。我们常常不喜欢看我们自己的局限性。但是，如果我们发现什么是我们的基本行为（或同事的话来说，'在你的和服看'，我们不仅对自己有一个更好的了解，然后才能真正做自己。
Uncover Your Inadequacies - By Goal-Free Living Book
Sometimes we don't want the world to know who we really are. Or maybe we try too hard to be the ideal person in the eyes of others. Hiding the truth from ourselves and others - and living our lives through the eyes of others - can be debilitating.
One person i met during my travels, Theresa, shared with me her struggle to embrace her limits : " I was driven by being liked. And it manifested itself as a compulsion to be perfect. In retrospect, I personally had no concept of what 'perfect' meant to me. I had only my beliefs of what others might define as the 'perfect live, what job i should have, or who i should date. Viewing my self through the eyes of others was my sole source of self-worth. If people didn't like me, I would crumble. Yet if I had their approval, I would be high as a kite. If only one person out of a group of 200 had something bad to say, I would crash, and crash hard.
" To ensure that i maintained this perfect personal - at work or in my personal life - I would avoid taking responsibility for mistakes. I would either cover them up or try to make it appear as if someone else made the error. It's ugly, I know. But I couldn't let anyone know that i had made a mistake, that i wasn't perfect. And even worse, I never passed along credit. I would position situations in such a way that I would received the praise. I must have been a horrible manager! I did all of this to gain respect at work. Funny though, how these actions were the very reasons I had lost so much of it. Oh, I was perfect all right - perfectly miserable. " While speaking with her, it became apparent that she had somehow freed herself from this compulsion.
I asked her what caused the shift in her personality. How did she let go of her need to be perfect in the eyes of others? She told me, "It wasn't a conscious decision actually. It was more driven by circumstances. Because of my need to please all people, all of the time, I was dropping balls left & right. I was becoming irritable and burnt out and it was becoming increasingly apparent to my co-workers that I was far from perfect. I had finally admit that I couldn't do it all.
" Then an interesting phenomenon occurred. As soon as I admitted at my shortcomings - those imperfections I tried so desperately to hide in an effort to gain respect and adoration- I could feel this tremendous weight lift. People responded differently to me. They did not react in the unfavorable means that I had anticipated - they actually treated me better, more sincerely. People wanted to help & support me. It wasn't until I showed the world I was imperfect that I started to gain the respect I had so longed for. I had this thought in my mind, from where it came I may never know, that I had to be perfect to be liked. I was such a deeply ingrained belief that I could not see beyond it. Now I have seen that those two ideas, being perfect and being liked were mutually exclusive, and I have taken it upon myself to live more genuinely.
"In the past, I never allowed myself to feel any kind of negativity. You know, the power of positive thinking. Yet it was the denial of these feelings that caused insurmountable stress within me. Now instead, I acknowledge how I really feel. If I am in a bad mood, I would say to the person I was talking with " Hey, just so you know, I am in a horrible mood today and if I say something nasty, I want to apologize in advance.' Once I embraced my negative thoughts or beliefs, I had permission to ask for help or to ask for forgiveness. But in most cases that thought just evaporated in the moment.'
Before you can let the world know who you really are, you need to know who you really are. We often don't like to look at our own limitations. But if we find out what is underlying our behavior ( or as a colleague calls it, 'Looking under your kimono', we not only have a better understanding of ourselves but are then able to really be ourselves.
One person i met during my travels, Theresa, shared with me her struggle to embrace her limits : " I was driven by being liked. And it manifested itself as a compulsion to be perfect. In retrospect, I personally had no concept of what 'perfect' meant to me. I had only my beliefs of what others might define as the 'perfect live, what job i should have, or who i should date. Viewing my self through the eyes of others was my sole source of self-worth. If people didn't like me, I would crumble. Yet if I had their approval, I would be high as a kite. If only one person out of a group of 200 had something bad to say, I would crash, and crash hard.
" To ensure that i maintained this perfect personal - at work or in my personal life - I would avoid taking responsibility for mistakes. I would either cover them up or try to make it appear as if someone else made the error. It's ugly, I know. But I couldn't let anyone know that i had made a mistake, that i wasn't perfect. And even worse, I never passed along credit. I would position situations in such a way that I would received the praise. I must have been a horrible manager! I did all of this to gain respect at work. Funny though, how these actions were the very reasons I had lost so much of it. Oh, I was perfect all right - perfectly miserable. " While speaking with her, it became apparent that she had somehow freed herself from this compulsion.
I asked her what caused the shift in her personality. How did she let go of her need to be perfect in the eyes of others? She told me, "It wasn't a conscious decision actually. It was more driven by circumstances. Because of my need to please all people, all of the time, I was dropping balls left & right. I was becoming irritable and burnt out and it was becoming increasingly apparent to my co-workers that I was far from perfect. I had finally admit that I couldn't do it all.
" Then an interesting phenomenon occurred. As soon as I admitted at my shortcomings - those imperfections I tried so desperately to hide in an effort to gain respect and adoration- I could feel this tremendous weight lift. People responded differently to me. They did not react in the unfavorable means that I had anticipated - they actually treated me better, more sincerely. People wanted to help & support me. It wasn't until I showed the world I was imperfect that I started to gain the respect I had so longed for. I had this thought in my mind, from where it came I may never know, that I had to be perfect to be liked. I was such a deeply ingrained belief that I could not see beyond it. Now I have seen that those two ideas, being perfect and being liked were mutually exclusive, and I have taken it upon myself to live more genuinely.
"In the past, I never allowed myself to feel any kind of negativity. You know, the power of positive thinking. Yet it was the denial of these feelings that caused insurmountable stress within me. Now instead, I acknowledge how I really feel. If I am in a bad mood, I would say to the person I was talking with " Hey, just so you know, I am in a horrible mood today and if I say something nasty, I want to apologize in advance.' Once I embraced my negative thoughts or beliefs, I had permission to ask for help or to ask for forgiveness. But in most cases that thought just evaporated in the moment.'
Before you can let the world know who you really are, you need to know who you really are. We often don't like to look at our own limitations. But if we find out what is underlying our behavior ( or as a colleague calls it, 'Looking under your kimono', we not only have a better understanding of ourselves but are then able to really be ourselves.
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